(26/32) “I could bring home $3000 a week if I was working the road. That was real money. Only the porn stars were making more than that, because nothing draws a crowd like having your face in a movie or magazine. In the 1970’s-- the biggest porn star around was Gloria Leonard. She was like the Meryl Streep of porno. I used to work with her a lot. Whenever she had a new movie screening at Show World, I’d go along with her to warm up the crowd. But Gloria wasn’t just a famous actress. She was the publisher of High Society, which was one of the biggest adult magazines going back then. Gloria was always trying to convince me to do a spread in her magazine, but I kept saying ‘no.’ Those shoots were full nude. But Gloria and I became good friends because she loved listening to my stories. One day we were laughing about something that happened, and she tells me: ‘You’d make a lot more money if you wrote for me.’ I told her: ‘C’mon Gloria.  It’s all an act.  My sex life is boring.  There’s nothing to write about.’  That’s when she leaned in real close, and whispered: ‘It doesn’t matter.  Just make it up.’  I went home that night and started typing. And when I showed Gloria what I wrote, she agreed to give me a column every other month.  We called it Tattletales From Tanqueray.  The pay was $500, and it only had to be two pages. The writing part took me forever because I’d failed typing class three times.  But the ideas came easy.  All I did was take a regular situation, and make it X-rated.  I pretended like I was having sex everywhere: grocery stores, movie theaters, the DMV. I even wrote about having sex in prison. And people believed I was actually doing that shit. Gloria published everything I wrote. She said I was the only writer that they never had to edit. I still wouldn’t let her put my picture in there-- just the headshot. But it didn’t matter. Because everybody read High Society.  You couldn’t buy that type of publicity.  And after the first issues came out, I was like famous.  Gloria would send boxes of the latest issue to all of my gigs.  Guys would be lining up on the street to get a signature. And my salary went up-- big time.”

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